I'm not sure how I remembered it or how i happened. All I know is that when it dawned on me, I was genuinely surprised. But somehow I realized that for the first time I left Cebu without shedding a single tear.

I'm not sure how I remembered it or how i happened. All I know is that when it dawned on me, I was genuinely surprised. But somehow I realized that for the first time I left Cebu without shedding a single tear.

Should I be alarmed? Is this a sign that my emotional attachment to the place has diminished, therefore making me immune to bouts of separation anxiety? Does this lack of the usual drama signify that I have come to terms with the fact that Cebu is no longer my home?

Should I be relieved? This may mean that finally I have overcome the nervous energy surrounding every goodbye. If that is true then it's about time. I have been coming in and out of Cebu for 11 years now and it's right that I learn to deal with it.

Does this simply mean that I had a terrific time?
Maybe the happy moments were enough to overpower the sadness of leaving everyone behind. And the prospect of going back someday can certainly help in making leaving easier. No goodbyes, just see you soon's.

Maybe it's not just one of those reasons, but all of them rolled into one. I may not have shed a single tear that one time but that doesn't mean I'm not sad. I just keep on remembering, no goodbyes.

February 9-10, 2011
MRT

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